English Monologue.


You guys, these past few days freaked me out.

Life isn’t always what you expected it to be and when you got a thousand hang-up stuff, you feel like shit. Lately me and my friends keep talking about me being so gayish (which is cool and friendly)  and me trying to make it out with “Unknown” who vanished after 2 phone messages. So what’s the problem? is that I misunderstood what I supposed to have his cell-phone number for?

Maybe it is. But I just wanted to be kind.

Yep, I know kindness isn’t so likeble nowdays but what am I supposed to do? You tell me.

I should get the fact that I can not meet the Right One standing with my friends or at least, not the ones I spend most of the time with. I have to look out for fresh meat, but why shouldn’t we wearing an AD-sign saying “I AM” and “I AM NOT”?  would be easier for the ones – like me – who don’t want to be so G-Licious.

Neither at work is so great. I don’t know if I’ll be able to keep my Book-Shop job because I’m honestly doubting to get the money I gained, because of my FREAK-show BOOS and because of I’m going to attend Univarsity or at least I would like to. When its time to make decision, my head starts asking billions of question without answer like: Am i doing the right thing? Why am I going back to “school”? Will I going back? should I try to find a real – artistical good job? Or should I leave Italy to find Fame & Fortune out there? The problem is I DON’t KNOW…

The world is a mess but Italy its like dead unless you have lots of money, senseless rich friends or you look so good that you can go on tv talking about shit, showin’ your a** off and get paid. What the hell??

The last good thing happened is maybe the saddest one, my dad bought me the new Christina Aguilera AlbumBack To Basics”. You have to know that I like good music with some exception and this is one of them, I grown up listening to Christina and even if she screams instead of singing I like her, so one week ago I asked my parents to be so helpful giving me money-credit to buy Christina’s. Dad just bought it for me. Too Kind. Me and my dad don’t always GET each-others and sometimes he fix it being kind, its not he doesn’t love me its just that he doesn’t like saying it. This present was “I love you” and I’m greatful.

I supposed to leave for someplace in Europe but Bin Laden & His Gang are giving us an hard time and lately as you get on the plane you have just to ask “Will I put my feet on the ground ever again?” or not flying at all. I’m against War but why have I to live any fu***n day like it would be the last? I don’t know…

This post was about  to be half & half. It all came out in English so here it is. You don’t understand English? ( or maybe you don’t understand my own way to write in English?) Getting bored? Even you go the hell……^_^



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